From the serious to the seriously disturbed...

Our good friend Dan (Random Thoughts of a Confessional Lutheran, a.k.a. the Rock Guy) gave Ron and me a copy of "The Dysfunctional Family Christmas Songbook" for Christmas. By the way, Dan, we both like and appreciate it!

I'd like to quote a song from it, just for Christmas kicks. So, here we go:
"Come Meet the Family" to the tune of "O Come All Ye Faithful"

O come meet the family,
Bad breeding triumphant;
O come meet the family dysfunctional.
Come and behold them
As they brag and fight and whine.

For it's a celebration
Of Christmas aggravation
And if you're no relation,
Just thank the Lord.

Come meet the drinkers,
Kleptos, kooks and stinkers.
Come meet the tattooed chick
And horny dog.
Don't miss the in-laws
Even though they'll make you puke.

For it's a celebration
Of Christmas aggravation
And if you're no relation,
Just thank the Lord.

Sing as you meet them,
Sing in exultation
Sing as you gather with
Your own nutty kin.
Look at your family:
They could be a whole lot worse.

For it's a celebration
Of Christmas aggravation
And if you're no relation,
Just thank the Lord.

Or, how about this one to the tune of "Jingle Bells":

"Grandpa's Drunk"

Lying in the snow
With his bourbon at his side
Grandpa's moving slow,
Mouth hung open wide.

Eyes like soft boiled eggs
Searching for his drink.
He cannot move his legs and things
Are getting bad, I think.

Oh, Grandpa fell, Grandpa fell,
Grandpa fell down drunk.
Oh, how bad it is to see him freeze into a chunk.
Oh, Grandpa fell, Grandpa fell,
Grandpa fell down drunk.
Oh, how bad it is to see him freeze into a chunk.

Grandma limps around,
Lookin' mighty miffed,
Spies an icy mound,
It's Grandpa or a drift.

Runs out in her robe
To give him a fat lip.
When she tries to roll him home,
She falls and breaks her hip.

Oh, Grandma fell, Grandma fell,
Grandma fell kerplunk.
Oh How sad it is to see her freeze into a chunk.

Oh, Grandpa fell, Grandpa fell,
Grandpa fell down drunk.
Oh, how sad to see both geezers freeze into a chunk.

Thank you, Dan, for the most splendid parody to Christmas songs. We will enjoy this very much!